Monday, October 14, 2013

Kloud Debacle Update #2

As promised, we'd keep you apprised of any new developments in the unfolding story of our recent joint cyber mind voyage. Today's clue comes in the form of the following inscription, which turned out to be a web address:örner_(author)

This URL was discovered tattooed to the left inner thigh of our own Huey Dood. Huey claims to have no knowledge of this "tat" prior to our kloud kuest. Why Huey discovered this only just today is cause for even more alarm, I mean, who goes for a month without taking off his or her pants?* Anyways, after transcribing the characters from Huey's funky gam into our web browser and striking the return key, we were simply shocked by what appeared on the screen several fractions of a second later. What we saw was a free internet encyclopedia article about a German poet-cum-soldier named Theodor Körner. As we read through the article, we quickly realized that Körner is a clear forebear to kontemporary kreationism. We also noted many striking similarities between Körner and our movement's founder, Gustav Kreationssen. The two men were in roughly the same age group, were kreative wunderkinds and stood as ardent opponents to Napoleon's tyranny in Prussia. Is it not possible, then, that Kreationssen and Körner may have encountered each other at some point between the former's arrival in Germany in 1806 and the latter's untimely death in 1813? We here at The Kreation Korner don't tend to believe in koincidences. We figure there's more to the story of our origins, more that will be revealed to us in the coming days, months and fiscal years. We also have the sneaking suspicion that this new knowledge will likely decimate many long-held assumptions and values. For the time being, all we can do is remain vigilant and bone up on this Theodor Körner guy. To that end, here's an excerpt we happened upon of his 1932 biopic:

*We have a theory that Huey is a "never-nude"--that's a reference to this kult TV show called Arrested Development we're just nuts for around the HQ. Give it a watch--it's probably on Netflix.

No comments: