Saturday, March 4, 2017

Faux Populism Korner

It's a demoralizing and disheartening day here at The Kreation Korner. We learned the verifiable fact from a credible, honest source that our former "benefactor" Chas Murdoch is no longer a guest of the state. Upon his early release from Embezzley Suites private prison in South Beach, he delivered an address (transcribed below) to his followers and we felt it necessary to push it out across our network to let reasonable, compassionate people everywhere know what they're up against. In his harangue, Murdoch unleashes a hateful litany of misrepresentations, extremely unvetted claims, and straight-up bald-faced lies directed at The Kreation Korner, the press, and the City of Boise. In sharing his demagoguery, we in no way intend to give Murdoch an elevated platform. Rather, we seek to reveal him as the callous, reckless, power-hungry rabble-rouser he is and let the denunciations and refutations drown him out. For while we can't deny he has the right to free speech, he has no right to be exempted from facing the consequences of that speech. Not by a damn sight. Let us strive to deny Chas Murdoch the legitimacy that would allow him to once again run roughshod over our organization and community. Get motivated:

The following was delivered by Chas Murdoch to a crowd of several hundred at a private aviation terminal at Boise Family Airport, March 3, 2017:

Hello Boise! Let me tell you, it great to be back in the City of Trees. For five years, it was five years I spent in the joint. Really it wasn't that bad, really. I was the top dog there. Even the guards, yeah. They loved me. But it's great to be back. You ever stare out a cell window at the ocean for five years? It's boring. Same waves crashing in and out all day. Terrible. Look out the hanger over there. Here in Boise WE HAVE DESERT, okay? Love the desert. Tremendous. [crowd applauds]
We have to take this city back. I've been gone only five years and things have gotten terrible here. What the hell is going on in Boise? And you know they don't want me here. You know who THEY are. [crowd boos] That's why they ran me out of town to begin with, with their lies. Like the failing Bench Triweekly Dispatch Intelligencer. They're fake news, they're dishonest people. And they were jealous of me, okay? That's why the told those disgraceful lies. Because, really, they're jealous, you know? They can't bear that the people they hate love me so much. You know they hate you. [crowd boos] They're the enemy of the people. But now I'm back. [crowd cheers] I'm back and we're going to take back Boise and give it to you, THE PEOPLE. [crowd cheers]
And what happened to The Kreation Korner? [crowd boos] Does anyone even read it anymore? They didn't know what to do without me. Since I've been away they haven't written ONE SINGLE POST! Not a single post. I say that and people tell me, "Chas, no Chas, they have written. The Kreation Korner has written a post," but they're wrong, you know? I'm right on this. Ask anybody. Lots of people. Lots of people, experts, have come out and said I'm right on this, okay? I know the blog the business, okay? Nobody knows it better than me. You heard it from me. The Kreation Korner is failing, it's boring, and nobody cares about it. [crowd applauds]
And what what about the Bench redevelopment project? Great project. New homes and jobs for hardworking Boiseans but the elites didn't want that either. Disgraceful. They want you to be poor, they want to take all the wealth for themselves. [crowd boos] It's true, it's true. They want to get rich off your hard work and leave you with nothing, but not anymore! [crowd cheers] We're going to take back our city! We're going to move forward with the bench redevelopment and it's going to be very special. It'll create a lot of jobs, A LOT of jobs. Construction jobs, good jobs. 20,000 permanent construction jobs. [crowd cheers] 
We're going to start a new company. It's called the Murdoch Organization and it's going to be very special. We're going to rebuild this city FOR THE PEOPLE. No more will you have to live in fear! [crowd cheers] We're bringing back my friend Hart Packard to manage operations. He's a great, great man. Tremendous. He got straight A's at Arizona State, smart man and very capable. He has my complete confidence. And together we're going to build a new city that the people can finally be proud of. We will start WINNING AGAIN! And the elites, those greedy career politicians in City Hall, they're not going to be able to stop us. If they stand in our way, we'll destroy their careers. Thank you! And thank ME!!! [crowd erupts into an unhinged orgy of applause and cheers]   

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